A Walk on the Wild Side
by LightFromTheStars
Summary: I got in the car with them and we sped off. I turned back and watched as a fight was starting. There was gonna be a lot of blood shed tonight, and all because of a stupid grudge. I looked around the people and spotted Nick and Kevin, who I thought was still in jail, apparently not. I sighed, 'assholes' to myself and Curly grinned, looking at me from the rearview mirror.
1. Chapter 1

I do not own the Outsiders nor the Shepards. Everything you don't recognize, I own.

I shuffeled up the street, my arms tightly across my chest to keep my jacket closed. It was a cold night and I still had a long way home. Evie had said, that Ryan could drive me home, but I had politely declined it. I really needed to walk home and clear my head.

I walked up the street, towards the small market near Will Rogers. Suddenly I felt a shiver run down my back, when I heard sirens wail, and two police cars hurtled past me. They drove into the parking lot across from park, where I was going to take a short cut.

The sound of sirens made me feel uneasy. I felt my pace quicken and soon enough I saw a crowd of people outside the market. I held my breath and made my way through the crowd, to see what was going down. My heart sunk as I saw my brother, leaning against the wall with his hands cuffed behind his back. The other police officer was escorting another boy, who I recognized as one of the Tiber Street Tigers, into the back of the police car. I turned my head towards my brother,

"Nick," I yelled and he turned his head to my direction. For a second I thought I saw sadness in his eyes, but it quickly faded away. He had a reputation to keep.

"I'll call you tomorrow Cas," he said as he was put in the police car. I looked down at my feet.

Soon I felt a hand grab my arm and pull me back from the crowd.

He shoved me a little further and was furious, "What the fuck are you doing here, huh?"

I looked up at Kevin and massaged my arm, where he had grabbed me, "I was just walking home" I looked past him and saw some of the boys from the Shepard outfit standing behind him. "And you just had to be by your lonesome?"

I met his eyes and could see he was angry, "Sorry" I muttered, mostly to myself. He grabbed my arm again and pushed me towards his car "You're so fucking dumb sometimes"

As we got to his car, he opened the passenger door for me and waited for me to get inside "I'm taking you home, get in the car" he commanded and I hesitated before opening my mouth "You're giving me the talk about walking lonesome when Nick is getting arrested?"

Kevin glared at me "He can take care of himself. Now, get in the fucking car before I put you in there."

I slid in the front seat and folded my arms across my chest. He slammed the door closed and lit up a cigarette. I watched Kevin's back, as he walked back to the group of his friends. Most of the crowd had cleared off, but Shepard's gang had stayed put.

Tim turned on his heels and said something to Kevin. Kevin responded, nodded my way and Tim's eyes shifted to me. He looked cold and hard, he wasn't one of the toughest hoods in Tulsa for no reason. He nodded to Kevin and smirked. Kevin turned around and walked to the car. He tossed his cigarette butt away and sat next to me. I heard him sigh and he patted my leg "Let's go home".

I kept staring out the window, looking at the passing lights as he started driving to our neighborhood.


	2. Chapter 2

I don't own the Outsiders nor the Shepards. Everything you don't recognize, I own.

The next morning I woke up to a creaking sound, as my bedroom door opened. I turned on to my side and saw Kevin leaning against the door frame.

I got up from the bed and walked to my closet, "You don't know how to knock anymore?" I asked.

I turned to look at him and he ran his hand through his hair "Look Cas, I'm sorry 'bout yesterday."

I looked down at my bare feet, pink nailpolish covering my nails. "I know" I turned around to look at him and couldn't help but smile. He was grinning, knowing very well I'd forgive him for being an asshole. I always did.

"Kevin!" We heard dad yelling from downstairs. Kevin turned his head towards the sound and then he turned back to me "Do you wanna go get breakfast?"

"Yeah, sure," I answered and turned to get my clothes. Soon I heard Kevin's footsteps as he stomped downstairs.

I changed my clothes and followed him downstairs. I walked into the kitchen and saw dad and Kevin sitting around the table. I went up to my dad and gave a kiss on top of his head. I saw the corner of his mouth curl up "Good morning sweetie". I just smiled and leaned against the counter, looking at both of them.

I had always been dad's girl. I was his only girl and he had always felt the need to protect me from everything. My brothers took it up from him and sometimes I just wished they would let me do my mistakes and learn from them.

Kevin fingered his car keys and gave dad a knowing look. My dad looked up from his paper and nodded. Kevin stood up and walked to the door and I followed him, without saying a word. Kevin walked up to the car and slid into the driver's seat. I sat next to him and he sped off towards the Ribbon.

We parked in Bowen's parking lot and made our way into the diner. Kevin insisted on us sitting in a booth and I didn't protest. A girl from my school, Lauren, was our waitress.

"Hey Cassie," she said smiling and looked at me and Kevin. The smile from her face faded, "What can I get you?" Kevin ordered and Lauren walked away, looking back at us from behind the counter. This was the reason I didn't like going to places with my brothers, they were intimidating without even realizing it.

Kevin put his hand on mine, "So, what are your plans for today?" I looked up and into his brown eyes. "I don't know, probably going to the race with Evie," I could see he didn't like what I had just said and quickly added "Steve's fixing a car for someone, so we aren't staying long." Kevin muttered something to himself and shook his head lightly "You better not and if the fuzz show, you have to go. Drinking in public, underaged, will land you in jail for the night."

He took a sip of his coffee and added, "And you know, you should steer clear of him" I knew he was talking about someone else. I pulled my hand from under his and fiddled the hem of my shirt. I hated having to talk to him about my personal life.

I was saved by the bell, when Lauren brought our pancakes to the table. I poured syrup on them and started eating without looking at Kevin. We ate in silence for a while, when Kevin lifted his gaze and looked towards the door. I followed his eyes and saw Mike, Tim Shepards' second in command, walk in. He waved at us and sat in the booth.

He turned his attention to Kevin, when he felt his eyes on him. "How long is your brother in?" Kevin shrugged, "Don't know, haven't heard from him" Mike frowned and gave me a pitying smile. I understood the cue behind it and got up from the booth. I looked at Kevin "I'll be outside" He just nodded back and I turned and walked out the door.

I felt alive, when I walked out the door and a warm breeze hit my face. I looked around to see if there were any familiar people hanging around Ribbon. There were a couple of girls sitting around a table right outside Bowen's. The other one I recognized as Angela Shepard and assumed the other one was Sylvia. Sylvia was one of the people I couldn't stand.

I walk to them and sat down next to Angela. "Hey Ang" She shifted her gaze to look at me "Oh, hey Cassie" Sylvia glanced at me contemptuously and continued to fix her makeup. "What are you doing here?" Angela asked "I was having breakfast with Kevin, until Mike showed up" Angelas eyes sparkled "Mike's here?" She started to adjust her clothing and hair, I rolled my eyes at her "Yeah, he's inside"

Angela had a crush on Mike, but she was wise enough to know that she couldn't be too obvious. Mike had a girlfriend for crying out loud. Tim would be furious if he knew. So Angela had decided to take it easy for a while, though I doubted it'd last long.

Sylvia put down her mirror and turned to look at me "So, how's your love life?" I snorted at her question "Couldn't be better" I said, giving her a smile. Before I started seeing Tim, he had fooled around with Sylvia, whenever Sylvia's ex-boyfriend was in the cooler. Tim and Dallas had been friends of some sort, but Dallas had been shot by cops the previous year. I assume they had fooled around after that too, but I wasn't sure so I kept my mouth shut.

Angela stood up and strolled over to Mike, who came outside. She started to flirt with him, twirling a lock of her hair and batting her eyelashes. I just smiled and walked over to Kevin, who was walking right behind Mike. I nudged his side and he grinned "Let's go, I'll take you home"

"Uh, could you drop me off at DX? I'm meeting Evie there and I don't feel like walking to her house."

"Sure thing" he opened the passenger door for me and I slid inside. As we sped off towards DX, the car radio was blaring, filling the car with Hank Williams.

When we arrived at DX, I could see Sodapop, Steve's bestfriend, filling a car outside. I stepped out of the car and said my goodbyes before closing the car door. I waved at Soda before going inside. I decided on a Pepsi and a fashion magazine and put the money on the counter, since I didn't see Steve anywhere, though I had a pretty good idea where he was. I sat next to the window, where I could see the front, and started riffling through the magazine.

After a while, I checked the clock on the wall, and saw that Evie was late, as usual. I stuffed the magazine in my purse and adjusted my skirt. I threw the empty can in the trash and walked up to the counter to ring the bell. Soon, Steve appeared from the garage, and his face said it all. Evie was walking right behind him, straightening out her clothes.

I grinned at my best friend "Took you long enough" She pushed me lightly and smiled. She gave a quick kiss on Steve's cheek and we walked to the door

"I'll see you ladies later " Steve yelled after us.

We walked to Evie's house. When we got there, there were cars parked outside. I heard Evie sigh.

"What's up?"

She looked at me "Ryan's got friend's over"

"Oh," was all I could say. I knew Evie's brother ran with the Brumly boys and that she didn't really like it. I really didn't know what to say, my own brothers were in trouble all the time, but I had stopped caring a long time ago. He kept getting into trouble all the time, and that caused him to fight more with their parents.

I dug a pack of cigarettes from my pocket and offered Evie one. She gratefully took it and I lit my own, offering my light to her too. We sat down on the porch and smoked in silence.

We had been bestfriends ever since we started middle school, and even though we were both 'going steady', if you could apply the term to me and Tim, we always had time for each other.

I grounded my cigarette butt on the ground and got up. Evie reluctantly walked inside, I was trailing right behind her. As soon as she opened the door, I could hear loud noises in the kitchen. We walked into Evie's room, the boys were too concentrated on their poker game to notice us.

I sat on the floor and pulled out the magazine. Evie dug her closet and took a brown bag out. She opened it and pulled out a whiskey bottle. We both grinned and she took a shot of it, grimacing. I took a shot too, and the liquid burned all the way down. Evie walked up to her radio and turned it on, filling the room with Elvis' soft voice. She sat next to me and we both leaned against the bed. We kept drinking the whiskey, even though the taste was awful.

Evie had been really quiet all day, and it seemed like something was bothering her.

Finally she laid her head on my shoulder "Cas, I invited Sylvia over tonight" I pushed her head off my shoulder and turned to face her

"What? You know I don't get along with her"

I could see Evie felt uncomfortable "I know, but I didn't want to be rude, she's my friend too" All I could think about was putting up with Sylvia's shit all night.

"She's a bitch" I snapped at her. Evie rolled her eyes

"She ain't that bad"

I lifted my eyebrows, "Do you even know her?"

After a few minutes, Sylvia opened the door slowly and stepped inside. I could see that she felt the same way about me. I stood up and walked to the window, cracking it open. I lit my cigarette and leaned out the window. Evie was glaring at me, since she didn't like to smoke inside, not to mention other people smoking inside. I just looked out. The evening was beautiful; sun was setting, casting the last rays of light behind the houses.

After tossing the cigarette butt out, I closed the window and sat on the floor, leaning against the wall. Sylvia went on about some guy she had met earlier and Evie listened to her. I was waiting for Steve to pick us up so wouldn't have to listen.

The time dragged on slowly, but when it finally hit seven, we heard Steve honking his car horn outside. We went outside, Evie sliding in the front seat with Steve. I just rolled my eyes and sat behind Evie in the backseat. Sylvia sat next to me, reluctantly closing the door and a cold atmosphere filled the back of the car. We hadn't said a word to each other the whole time, and I was glad.

The ride seemed to take forever and as soon as we stopped by the other cars, I jumped out of the car and headed in search for beer.

"Where are you going?" Evie yelled after me.

I waved at her "to get something to drink".

When I finally found a car with beer in the trunk, I snatched two, putting the other one in my purse. There was always beer available in races, you just needed to know where to look.

I strolled back over to Steve's car and leaned against the hood. I opened a beer and took a sip.

Soon, Evie came to sit next to me "Where did you leave Sylvia?" She took the other

beer from my purse, which was sitting between us

"She found better company" she said nodding her head behind me. I turned and saw Sylvia flirting with some guys from Brumly, with Angela Shepard next to her. I grinned and turned back around.

We sat there for a while, looking at Buck, who was taking bets from people. People were lining in front of him, to place their bets before the race started. Suddenly he waved at us and motioned for me to go there. I walked over to him and he handed me a flag. "You're gonna flag tonight" I grabbed the flag and made my way over to the street, where the race was gonna start any minute. I had done this a few times before, but usually Buck had his own girls to do the flagging, though I didn't mind; I loved doing it.

The crowd started gathering around the cars. Two souped up cars were standing next to each other, facing up the street, where they would be racing. The drivers were in their places, anxious for the race to start. I could feel eyes on my back, when I walked between tha cars. I walked about 6 feet in front of the cars and looked at the drivers. I smiled, when I saw Tim sitting in the other car. I winked at him, and he shook his head and chuckled to himself.

In the other car, a boy from River Kings was glaring at Tim and revving up his engine. Tim looked at the boy and revved his engine in response. I lifted my hands up, to give the drivers a signal to get ready. I could see their palms sweating against the steering wheel.

This was the most amazing part of the race, all the tension building up. I let my hands fall down to my sides and closed my eyes. I felt a burst of air on my face as the cars leapt forward. All the tension was released and people were cheering. I turned around to watch their tail lights as they raced up the street.

I walked back to Buck and handed him the flag. He grabbed it and kept on squinting at the finish line, to see who won. I smiled at him and turned to look at the crowd cheering at the other end of the raceway.

Both of the cars came back and when Tim stepped out, the crowd was cheering. People slapped his back when he walked by. I saw Curly walking behind him with a proud look on his face.

Steve was amazing with cars and Tim was a great driver, probably one of the best in Tulsa. He wasn't afraid to take the car to its limits, and Steve made that possible. I guess that's why they were such a good team.

Tim saw me and made his way towards me, as I listened to Buck counting all the money he had made from the race. I leaned against Buck's car, arms folded on my chest.

He stood in front of me, his hands on my hips "If I'd known you'd be here, I would've dressed up"

I lifted my eyebrow at him "Flattering now are we? Did you do something stupid?"

He grinned and kissed my forehead "Are you going to Buck's?" he whispered into my ear

"If you are," I answered as Mike walked over to us and Tim's posture changed.

He turned to Mike and lit up a cigarette. Mike looked at me, "Hey Cas," and turned to Tim "They are on our turf again, we gotta do something" Tim frowned, deep in thought. Then he lifted his hand and motioned for some of his boys to come.

"Let's do it" he said and Mike and the boys went to Tim's car.

He turned to me "I'll see you later" and walked to his car. He sped off and I was lef there, standing alone. The crowd was starting to stuff into cars and continue the party at Buck's. I walked back to Evie and Steve, and we left for Buck's.

Buck's was always packed after races, probably more then than usually. I could hear the music blaring inside when I stepped out of the car. I lit up a cigarette and watched Evie and Steve go inside, holding hands. I leaned my head against the car and watched the stars, enjoying the cool air outside.

Sun had set a few hours ago and it was dark, and all I wanted was to curl up next to Tim and smell the mixture of cigarettes and cologne. But that didn't happen. I waited for him at Buck's until 2 in the morning. People were still drinking, dancing and playing pool. There had been a fight earlier, but Buck had broken it off and the fuzz didn't show.

I walked to my brother, who had arrived moments before. "Can we go home?"

He looked down at me "If you want to"

"Yeah, I just want to get some sleep" I sighed and walked to the door, Kevin following right behind me, holding his hand on my shoulder.


	3. Chapter 3

I don't own the Outsiders nor the Shepards. Everything you don't recognize, I own.

It was Sunday, a day I tried to spend with dad. I ran the steps downstairs and sat next to dad in the kitchen.

"Morning baby"

"Morning dad" I kissed his cheek and grabbed myself a cup of coffee.

"Cassie," my father cleared his throat "we're gonna go see Nick today"

"Really?"

"So please, go get ready" I went upstairs and drank my coffee while picking out clothes. When I was ready, I walked downstairs, where dad and Kevin were waiting.

When we arrived at the Tulsa City Jail, there were a lot of cars outside. I recognized Mike's car outside and his brother Aiden was leaning against it. I waved at him shyly and he waved back, with a mischevious smile on his face.

Kevin and I walked inside and up to the officer standing behind the counter "We're here to see Nick Savage" The officer looked at us cautiously, as if all hell was going to break loose.

"You have to wait a minute, there are no rooms available" He motioned us to sit on the benches next to the wall.

I sat down and Kevin dug his pockets for a smoke "I'll be right back" Then he walked off. I leaned against the wall, scanning around the room. I saw Mike standing on the other side of the room, waiting for something. He noticed me, nodding a hello. I just smiled in response and looked down at my feet.

Soon I heard the door open and looked up. I assumed it would be the guard to let me in to see Nick, but it wasn't. It was Tim and then it all hit me. He had a black eye and I'm sure he couldn't see with it. He was also holding his arm against his side, which for most people would be normal, but I knew he was hurting. All of the anger that had been present before, was gone, and all I could think about was holding him and telling that everything would be okay. Unfortunately, our relationship didn't work like that.

I saw him grinning and talking with Mike, who nodded his head at my way. Tim turned around all the way and looked confused for a moment. Then he walked up to me and I got up, putting my arms around him. He held me there for a moment and then pushed me away.

I put my hand on his cheek "What happened?"

He rolled his eyes "Some problems with the turf boundaries"

Tim looked at Mike, who was waiting for him to go.

He looked down at me "I'm having a meeting tonight at my house, you coming?" His idea of a meeting was far from mine; his included boose, his boys and ladies. His mom must be working tonight.

"I'll see about it" He grinned, knowing I'd be there. He tucked a lock of hair behind my ear and walked off, Mike following him out the door. Kevin walked in and didn't have time to sit down, when we were called in.

I saw Nick sitting on the other side of the table. I ran around the table and ran into his arms. He felt warm and I buried my face in his chest.

"Hey pumpkin, I missed ya too" he kissed my cheek and held me until I was ready to let go.

He sat down and I went to sit next to Kevin. Kevin and Nick just exchanged knowing looks and then Nick spoke up,

"They got nothing on me, the other guy ain't pressing charges, so I should be out soon enough" I was relieved, I was afraid he might have to be there long.

Then Nick looked at me "I saw Tim here too, he didn't look too good" I looked down at my shirt, fiddling the buttons "Yeah, he got in a fight and spent the night here"

Nick sighed "You know, you could find someone better"

I crossed my arms across my chest "You too? It's none of your business, so just drop it"

I got up, "I'm gonna wait outside, see you when you get out Nick"

I stormed out the door and went to sit with dad in the car.

"You were fast" dad said when I closed the car door.

"Mm, they were nagging about Tim, so.."

Dad grinned "Ah, I see." Then his face turned serious "As long as he's good for you, he's alright with me" he extended his arm around my shoulder and I scooted closer to him

"Thanks dad". he chuckled and ruffled my hair, "And it's not like your brothers have anything to say about being good, huh?"

I grinned and laid my head on his shoulder "True"

When Kevin closed the car door, we sped off towards our neighborhood. It wasn't too bad, it was near the river, in the River King turf. It was peaceful enough.

We pulled up the driveway "Cas, you go inside and get lunch started, we'll be right in" dad looked at me and smiled.

I got out of the car and went in. I was curious, so I peeked through the kitchen window. Dad had turned towards Kevin and was telling him something, and Kevin sat there, looking down and listening to dad.

Dad had always been good with all of us, the boys just didn't know how to act decent. They stole things, got in fights and ran with Tim and his outfit. But dad had always had away of getting them to listen. I don't know how he did it, but it seemed to work.

Kevin stepped out of the car and walked inside, his hands stuffed deep in his pockets.

He came to the kitchen "Sorry Cas" He put his arms around my shoulders.

"It's alright" I answered as I walked to the fridge to get the stuff for burgers. We usually had barbeque on Sundays, when dad had time to be home. He worked alot to keep food on the table. Dad walked inside, with a few cases of beer and went to the backyard to fire up the grill.

The rest of the day was quite nice. We talked about school, maybe going on a roadtrip and about my future. My brothers didn't have a high school diploma, so my father wanted to make sure I'd get mine.

Around seven, I walked downstairs with my schoolbag and some clothes, "Kevin, can you drive me to Tim's?"

He turned his attention away from the game on TV "Sure, I have to head there anyway"

When we parked on the side of the road, after a silent ride, I walked straight to the porch.

Some of the guys were outside smoking "Hey Cassie"

Kevin had walked up to the porch and lit up his cigarette, so I decided to go inside.

There were a lot of people inside, drinking and chatting. I put my bag by the stairs and walked into the kitchen, looking for something to drink. As I walked in, I saw Angela sitting on the counter and chatting with some of her friends I hadn't seen before.

"Hey Angela" I greeted politely.

"Hey Cassie"

I took a beer from the fridge and exited the room, not wanting to listen to them gossiping. I saw Tim playing poker with some boys, so I walked behind him, leaned my arms on his shoulders and kissed his cheek "Hey you"

I saw the corners of his mouth curl up in a smirk "Hey baby".

In a normal situation he would've murmured something in response and kept concentrating on the game, but since he'd had a few drinks, or maybe more, he

seemed happy that I was there.

There was a knock on the door. Tim turned his gaze towards the door and then looked at Curly, "You going to open it?"

Curly adjusted himself in the reclainer with Lauren, his on-and-off girlfriend, sitting in his lap "Go get it yourself"

I could feel Tim tense up and I took a few steps backwards as he got up from his chair. He walked to Curly's direction and Curly shot up faster than I'd imagined possible. Tim shook his head, "Too late, fucker" I saw Tim clench his fist and giving Curly a good blow in the back of his head.

I could swear I heard Tim mutter 'no-good punk', which would be quite normal for him.

He opened the door, "The fuck do you want?" His demeanor changed as he saw the person outside.

He leaned against the door frame, "I need a word with your little mrs." the deep voice answered, Tim wasn't bothered by the intimidation in the voice "Not happening, you got something to say, say it. Otherwise, fuck off"

I stood up and Tim pointed his index finger at me, motioning me to sit back down. The house had fallen silent, apart from the music that was playing in the background.

I went to the door, but stood behind Tim just to be safe. When I saw, that it was Nick's old school friend Damian, who was currently running with the Kings, I rolled my eyes at him.

He grinned at me "Well, ain't it little mrs. Went by your house, but your old man said I'd find you here"

I looked at Tim and he put his arm in front of me. "What do you want?" I asked Damian, trying to sound confident, even though I was scared. I had seen what this guy was capable of, and believe me, I didn't want to experience it.

"Just to talk"

I crouched a little and went under Tim's arm, turning to face him "It's okay, I'll be right back" He didn't take his eyes off of Damian. He kept his stance as I walked further away from the door, right behind Damian.

When we had almost reached the sidewalk, Damian turned around to face me, "I got some unfinished business with Nick"

I was confused, "why are you talking to me then, and not him? And besides, you know as well as I do, that he ain't into that anymore, not after what you did last year."

Damian looked tired "He owes me money, so I'm telling you, that it's either you, Kevin or him. Since Kevin won't be around to do it and Nick is in the cooler, there's only you"

I took a few steps back "Nick was in the cooler, because you put him in there, and he went back because he's stupid enough to get caught.. I ain't doing anything for you. And what are you talking about Kevin?"

Damian grinned "I thought you might say that, but I'll tell you, I can make your life hell if I decide to"

I started to panic and felt my palms sweating "Look, I ain't the person for the job"

Damian lit up his cigarette and took a drag, "I'll tell you what, meet me at Dingo tomorrow after you get off of school, and we'll talk"

He straightened out and I felt an arm around me. Tim glared at Damian, "You had your time, now get off my turf" he growled and Damian chuckled and waved at us, before getting into his car and speeding off.

I started to panic when I didn't see Kevin's car anywhere. Tim noticed something was wrong and grabbed my shoulders when I started having trouble breathing, "What did he want?"

I tried to calm down, but didn't succeed "Nothing. Where's Kevin? I gotta find him. Damian said that Kevin won't be around.. What if he did something?"

I spoke so fast it made my head spin and Tim put his arms around me, making me feel safer, "Take it easy, your brother's tuff, he'll take care of himself."

Tim lead me back inside and closed the door. "I'll take care of that asshole" he whispered into my ear. I sat down in the recliner and nervously twirled a lock of my hair. I heard Tim talk something to Mike who was sitting on the couch with his girlfriend in his lap.

That was something I envied about them; they were together, probably loved each other and were showing it. Tim would never do anything in public to indicate that he loved me. To be honest, he hadn't even said the words to me, ever. I guess he had his reputation to keep.

Mike kissed his girlfriend and ran out the door only seconds later, when Tim walked back to me and crouched in front of me "Just, don't go anywhere lonesome, ya hear?" I looked into his eyes, "Yeah"

Everyone in the room were staring at us, and they had even stopped the music. Tim whispered something to Curly, who nodded with a determined look on his face. I took my bag and climbed upstairs, making my way into Tim's room.

I could hear Tim talking to his boys, but Curly was walking up the stairs, right after Angela.

Angela was bitching to Curly, who sighed loudly, "This is the reason he's so strict, so you avoid shit like this"

I heard Angela cuss Curly out and go into her room, slamming the door harder than necessary.

I changed into my pajamas and laid down on the bed. I turned my back to the door, and let the hot tears fall down my cheeks. I had never been this scared in my entire life and I didn't know what to do. I wiped my eyes with the back of my hand and curled under the covers, trying to get some sleep.

Few minutes later I heard the door open and close, Tim taking his boots and clothes off, and sitting on the edge of the bed. He laid down, and I crawled as close to him as I could. I laid my head on his chest and he kissed my nose, "I won't let anything happen to you" I looked up at him and kissed his lips softly, "I know".


	4. Chapter 4

I don't own the Outsiders nor the Shepards. Everything you don't recognize, I own.

The alarm went off in the morning, and I just didn't feel like getting up. I turned it off and turned on my stomach, hiding my face in the pillows. Suddenly I felt strong arms grab my sides and Tim pulled me on top of him. I laid there, resting my head on his chest, "Good morning beautiful," he pulled the cover on both of us and I just laid there, listening to his heart beat.

"Mike found Kevin, he was at Buck's drinking"

I kissed his chest and whispered, "Thank you".

"I don't want to get up" I said after a moment of silence.

Tim laughed, "I know baby, but I promised your old man you'd go to school"

I snorted, "Fine". I got up and put on my clothes, while Tim was laying on the bed. "You know, you're gonna have to take me"

He got up and grinned, starting to look for clothes. I skipped down the steps, to make some coffee. Angela was already awake, sitting in the kitchen, and I could smell the coffee "Thanks Angela," I took a cup of coffee and sat down to read the paper.

When I was done, I walked to the door, waiting for Tim, "Come on, I'm gonna be late"

Tim lazily walked down the steps, digging his pockets for his car keys. As he reached the door, he swirled the keys in his hand, "Let's go Angel" She didn't say a word, just walked to the car. She was pissed at Tim, again.

When we arrived at Will Rogers, Tim stopped the car and put his hand on my shoulder, watching Angela walk inside the school, "I'm picking you up"

Then I rememberd I had promised, or was forced, to meet Damian at the Dingo, "I,

uh, got a meeting with my counselor after school" I lied, hoping he wouldn't notice.

He frowned, and I stroked his stubble "I'll meet you at Dairy Queen after that, around four?"

"Alright"

He nervously tapped on his steering wheel, "I'll see you then".

I got out of the car and he sped off. As I made my way into the school, all I could think about the horrifying moment of going to the Dingo.

I had never been book smart, and had to actually work for good grades. I had been neglecting it though, and it was showing in my grades.

"What happened here?" My English teacher asked as he was going through a paper I wrote.

"This is not your normal level of writing" He lifted his glasses on his head and massaged the bridge of his nose, "You really should put in a little more effort, you could be whatever you wanted"

I looked down at my paper, "Yeah, I'll work more on this"

He leaned back in his chair, "Good, that's all I have, for now at least."

I walked out, crumpling up the paper and tossing it in the trash can.

As I walked out of my last class to my locker, I was mentally shaking. I saw Evie leaning against my locker, "Hey Eve, what's up?"

I tried to be as normal as possible, she raised her eyebrows at me, "I could ask you the same thing, where were you yesterday?"

I smiled, "at Tim's"

A grin spread across her face, "Aha, did you have fun?" she asked, poking my side.

I opened my locker and shook my head lightly, "Is that all you care about?" '

She giggled, "So you did!" she exclaimed, loudly enough for the whole school to hear.

"Thanks for informing the whole school" I put my books in and slammed the door closed, "Are you waiting for Ryan?"

"As always"

I looked at the clock and noticed, that I should get going, if I was going to make it to the Dairy Queen by four.

"Well, I gotta go, I'll see you later" Evie waved at me and walked to the opposite direction.

It took me fifteen minutes to walk to the Dingo, and I saw Damian's car outside. There were also other members from the River Kings, which didn't make me feel any

better. I took a deep breath and walked in.

The Dingo was dimly lit and filled with smoke. I could barely see anything, when I felt someone grabbing my arm. Damian was sitting in a booth, near the door and I sat down across from him.

He grinned at me, "You came, I thought you might not"

I could feel the sweat roll down my back, "Let's just get this over with"

He nodded, "Right down to business, I like that." he took a sip of his coffee, "Alright, from what happened last year, your brother owes me money, and the car he crashed when the cops got him" he stated matter-of-factly.

I was surprised, "Didn't you call the fuzz?" He rolled his eyes, "Of course I did, he was gonna switch to Shepards"

"Then what's the problem, the crash was your fault"

He was mad, I could tell, without even being able to see his face expressions clearly.

"Look girl, all's you gotta worry about is getting the money and the car for me"

I shrugged and thought for a moment, "And how do you think I'll do that? Nick and Kevin will be pissed when they find out"

Damien looked up from his coffee and muttered with an unlit cigarette between his lips, "They ain't gonna find out, they'll be in the pen faster than you think" then he looked satisfied, "If that is correct," he said pointing at the clock on the wall, "Kevin'll be taking a trip in the cop car as we speak"

All the color from my face drained and I felt sick. I looked up at the clock and it was almost four. I got up and Damian cleared his throat, "I'll expext you be ready by the end of next week."

Great, now I had to figure out how to get it done.


	5. Chapter 5

I don't own the Outsiders nor the Shepards. Everything you don't recognize, I own.

I walked as fast as I could, without being suspicious, and as I reached Dairy Queen, Tim was leaning against his car, smoking a cigarette. I felt relieved, feeling that I would be safe, at least for now. I walked up to him and he opened the passenger door for me, "Let's go"

I slid down in the car and he slammed the door shut, walked around the car and sat behind the wheel. We drove towards my house and I looked at the passing houses and thought about Damian's words. I didn't want Tim to know I'd gotten myself into shit he was trying to keep his siblings away from.

As he pulled up by my house, I got out without saying a word, and walked inside. I closed the door behind me, leaning against it and closed my eyes. I didn't hear anything, it was silent. There wasn't anybody else but me, and I decided I had to talk to Nick. I picked up the phone and dialed the City Jail number.

I was waiting for them to connect me to Nick, if he decided to use his phone call now.

"What?" his grumpy voice asked at the other end of the line.

"Hey Nick, it's me."

"Oh hey Cas, wasn't expecting you to call"

I cleared my throat, "Me neither, but something happened and I need to talk to you.. About last year"

"What happened?" he asked, sounding concerned.

I took a deep breath, "Damian expects me to clean up your mess, since apparently Kevin will be joining you soon"

"He what?" he asked angrily, then added bluntly, "Yeah, Kev was brought here a few

minutes ago.."

I just waited him to continue. He took a deep breath, "Last year, Damian started to take in stolen cars, taking them apart and selling the parts. I was fine with that, until he started to take cars from his 'associates', 'cause when you take a car and don't know where it came from, that's when shit hits the fan." he kept a small break, then continued, "We wanted out, me and Kev, but I promised him I'd pick up one more car. Damian called the fuzz and I crashed the car. They sent me to Mac, and Damian went on with his business."

I listened to every word he said, trying to make sense about all this, "He wants me to get him a car and some money" I said, hoping he wouldn't get too angry.

I heard him swear at the other end, "Shit Cas, you can't do that. I mean, you can give him the money, I still got it. But stealing a car, it ain't child's play. You get sent to Mac for that"

I sighed, "I know, but what do you expect me to do?" I said sounding irritated, "I'm not gonna wait for him to come collect it after next week".

Nick thought for a moment, "Tell Tim, he'll know what to do. The money's in my drawer. My time's up, I'll try and figure this out. Please," he pleaded, "be careful".

"I will" I said and put down the phone.

I went to Nick's room and it was messy. I went and opened his drawers, pulling things out in search of the money. I was throwing things on the floor and started to panic about it not being there. The last drawer, and I threw his socks down, but the made a different noise. I picked them up and the money was hidden in a brown bag, stuffed inside the sock. I grabbed it and went to put it into my purse.

I sat down on the couch, to think about what to do. I had always had someone to help me, someone to tell everything, but I didn't want to cause anymore trouble by telling Tim.


	6. Chapter 6

I don't own the Outsiders nor the Shepards. Everything you don't recognize, I own.

As I winced awake, I looked out the window. It was already dark outside. I looked at the clock and stretched, 'shit, I slept for hours' I murmured to myself, getting up and putting my jacket on. I decided I needed to talk to someone, who'd probably understand me.

I grabbed my purse and went out, starting to walk towards the Brumly turf, where Weber's was located. I walked along the train tracks, and ran my fingers through my hair, inhaling the cool night air.

Suddenly a car honked behind me, making me jump. I turned around to see and saw it was Tim.

Curly, who was sitting in the front, rolled the window down, then Tim's angry voice came through the open window, "What the fuck Cassie? Didn't I tell you not to walk around alone?"

I shrugged and looked at him, "I'm just going to Weber's"

I could see his eyes narrowing, "I don't think I asked about that, why the fuck are you alone? Are you fucking stupid or just looking for trouble? 'Cause this is how you find trouble"

I looked straight into his eyes, I wasn't going to listen to this, "You know what Tim, fuck off" I yelled at him and walked forward, keeping my eyes on the horizon.

I could see from the corner of my eye, that he was driving next to me, "Get in the fucking car, now"

I shook my head "You really think you can do and say what you want and everyone will follow. I think I was clear when I told you to fuck off" I snapped at him, turning into a park where he wouldn't be able to follow me. I quickened my pace, to make it to Weber's before him storming in.

When I got to Weber's, I didn't see Tim's car anywhere and was relieved. I sighed and walked in and up to the counter. An older man greeted me politely.

I smiled, "Is mrs. Shepard here?"

He looked confused for a moment, then a wave of realization came over him, "Ah, yes. I'll call her for you, just a moment."

The old man turned around and yelled through the opening to the kitchen, "Miriam, come here for a moment, here's a young lady to see you". I

sat there for a minute, before she came to the front, "Cassie," she said with a tint of concern in her tone, "is everything okay?"

I smiled and looked down, feeling ashamed, "I'm in a lot of trouble".

Miriam walked around the counter and motioned for me to follow her to the booth. I went to sit down, as she walked to the counter to get cups and coffee. She poured us coffee and sat down, "What happened, sweetie?"

When I had told her the whole story, she looked down at her coffee, swirling it with a spoon, as I continued, "I'm gonna take the money anyway, with or without the car"

She looked up, "Don't do anything stupid. Tim would go crazy if you got arrested. He really cares for you."

I looked out the window, afraid of confronting Tim, "I really doubt that, at least he doesn't show it in any way"

Miriam smiled, "A mother knows. It isn't his style to say things like that, it would ruin his reputation, or that's what he uses as an excuse" Then she looked at me, "Why don't you tell Tim? He'd help you."

I shook my head, "He's already angry at me, I don't want to make it worse. He thinks he can control me like his boys.." I took a deep breath and let out a loud sigh, "Sometimes I'm afraid of him, you know. He's always so calm, but he's just a human, I'm afraid he'll blow.."

Miriam took my hand in hers, "Don't worry about it".

Then we sat in silence for a while, until I heard a car park outside. Looking out the window, I saw Tim getting out of his car and walking towards the door. Curly wasn't in the car anymore, so I assume Tim'd taken him home. I looked at Miriam, who had her eyes on Tim.

As Tim opened the door and saw us, his expression softened, but only a little, "Hey ma" he greeted his mother, who stood up and put her hand on my shoulder, squeezing it lightly, "It'll be okay, trust me"

She walked to Tim, "Don't be too hard on her, she's already freaked out as it is".

Tim sat across from me, and I looked down at my coffee. He put his fingers under my chin, lifting it up gently, "Would you just promise me, that you don't go wandering alone, okay?"

He cupped my face into his rough hands and I sighed, "I promise, but I just.." he put his index finger over my mouth, "Let's just get you home"

He stood up and offered his hand, which I took, and he pulled me up.

I looked at Miriam, who nodded and smiled. Tim opened the doors for me, and we walked to his car. I leaned against the passenger side door, holding my palm open in front of him, wiggling my fingers, "a cigarette" he offered me one from his pack, waiting for me to take it. He lit it up for me and waited for me to smoke some of it, before lighting his own.

I took his hand in mine, "Would it be okay, if I stayed at your house? I don't want to be alone.." I trailed off and he grinned, "Why wouldn't it be? Besides, I got something to make up to you" he said winking at me and walking around the car. I had a faint blush on my cheeks as I threw my cigarette butt away and slid next to him in the car.


	7. Chapter 7

I don't own the Outsiders nor the Shepards. Everything you don't recognize, I own.

The next few days went by slowly, Tim would pick me up and take me everywhere, since both of my brothers were spending their time in City Jail.

The bag of money had been in my purse, and I was determined to take it to Damian today, since I knew Tim would be going on with his business. After school I took the bus home, but got off a few stops before, since I had a pretty good idea where Damian would be hanging. I walked by the river, towards a football field where I had seen him on multiple occasions.

As I reached the side further from the store, I saw his car parked in the lot next to the field, and started walking that way. Some of the Kings were there too, and one of them noticed me, pointing his finger in my direction. Damian turned around and grinned, when he recognized me.

He walked down the steps and waited for me to walk the rest of the way, "You're

brave to come here."

"I live close by" I informed him.

He raised his eyebrows, "I know. Now, what do you want?"

"I got your money" I said as I dug my purse for the brown paper bag. I gave it to Damian and he looked surprised.

He counted the money and looked at me, "I'm still one car short" he reported.

"How am I gonna get you a car?"

He lifted his arms up "Ain't my problem" He turned away and walked back to his car, and I walked back to the river side and headed home.

I walked home and saw Curly sitting on the porch. I walked up to him, surprised to see him, "What are you doing here?"

He looked up, "Tim told me to wait for you here, gotta take you back to my place."

He got up and took out a joint, lighting it up and taking a drag, "Tim'll skin you for that" I told him.

He looked at me from the corner of his eye and offered it to me. I accepted it, taking a long drag. He grinned at me "That makes two of us."

We walked around for a while, smoking the joint and feeling the buzz it was giving us. "You know what," Curly said, "you ain't as bad as I thought you was"

I felt light-headed, "You ain't as stupid as you let everybody think" I said to him and smiled. I gave him the rest of the joint, which he smoked and threw the butt on the ground.

I bet we reeked like weed when we got back to their house. Tim's car wasn't anywhere to be seen, so we were safe for now. When we went inside, I decided to study, so I'd graduate next year and sat on the couch with some books. Curly sat in the recliner and propped his feet on the coffee table, turning on the TV to watch a football game.

I have no idea how long we had been there, but I heard the door slam and Tim walked up to me, with a beer in his hand, "Mike saw you with Damian today. Wanna tell me about that?"

He sat next to me, put my book away and stared intensively in to my eyes. I swallowed a lump, that was forming in my throat. I could see from the corner of my

eye, that Curly made his way into the kitchen.

"Well?" he inquired.

"Well, I'm in a shitload of trouble, Tim" I admitted and looked down.

"Fucking great" he murmured, "What'd you do?" It took him a while, but then he

added, "Does it have something to do with Damian's visit on Sunday?"

I nodded in response.

"Fuck," he shook his head, "You should've told me" he said in a calm tone.

"I know, I was afraid you'd be pissed." he raised his eyebrows, as I added, "And I didn't do anything"

"Then what is it?"

I bit my lip, "Well, he wants me to clean up my brother's mess. He needs me to steal a car"

I could see Tim's eyes were flaming with rage, "Don't you fucking dare to do that" he raised his voice, which he rarely did.

I stood up and walked few steps away from him, "I wasn't going to.. I just thought maybe giving him the money.. "

Tim interrupted me, "What money? That's what you did today?"

I nodded, "Yeah, I don't know what it was for, but he still said he's a car short. I didn't know what to do Tim" I said, looking down at my shoes.

"They could've beat the shit out of you, they don't care about you bein' a girl. They ain't fair either, they beat people up for kicks. Jesus, what were you thinking Cas?" he massaged the bridge of his nose.

I felt my eyes filling with tears as I backed away from him. He was so angry it scared me.

"I don't know" I yelled.

Tim took a swig of his beer, "I thought I told you to stay out of trouble"

I was by the front door, "I wasn't asking for any of this" I screamed at him, tears pouring down my cheeks.

He lifted his gaze and he was angry, worse than I had ever seen "God damnit Cas" he yelled and threw his beer bottle.

I covered my face as the bottle shattered into small pieces, the pieces flying everywhere. I moved my hands from my face and looked at Curly, who had come from the kitchen. He was watching us, looking surprised. I turned to look at Tim, who massaged his temples, "Shit Cassie," was all I could hear before storming out the door and up the street.


	8. Chapter 8

I don't own the Outsiders nor the Shepards. Everything you don't recognize, I own.

I was scared of Tim, of the whole situation. He doesn't lose his temper, ever. Now all of a sudden, he's yelling and throwing bottles at me. It sent a shiver down my back. I looked around, but saw nothing, so I continued my way towards Evie's, hoping she'd be home.

I reached her house quickly, since she lived close to Tim. I ran up to her door and knocked. I heard muffled voices and Ryan opened the door. I looked down at my shoes as he looked at me,

"Evie," he yelled, "Come here"

Evie came downstairs and stopped dead in her tracks when my eyes met hers. "Oh

sweetie, what happened?"

She came up to me, putting her arms around me, "It'll be okay" I felt tears on my cheeks and brushed them off.

Ryan was looking at both of us, closed the door and walked away. He mumbled something about girls, as he passed us. I followed Evie to her room and sat on the floor.

She went out and came back with tissues, "What happened?" She sat in front of me and held my hands.

I sighed, "I think me and Tim are over. We fought and it got out of hand"

Evie looked sad, "I'm so sorry, I know how much he meant to you" then she added, "You can stay here tonight, if you want to"

"Could I?"

"Of course," she said and got up, "I'll be right back"

Not a lot later, she came back, with hot chocolate for both of us, turned on the radio and sat next to me.

I took a sip of my hot chocolate, "Thanks Evie" We sat in silence, until she started to sing along to the radio, and she couldn't sing. It made me smile and took my thoughts off of Tim.

Next morning, Ryan took us to school. When his car was out of sight, Evie turned to look at me, "Why don't we do something fun today?"

"Like what?"

She smiled, "We could, uh, go to DX"

I raised my eyebrows, "So you can make out with Steve?"

She put her hands on her hips, "No," she rolled her eyes, "We could just hang and read magazines or something. Girly stuff that we used to do more often."

I thought for a moment, "Okay, let's go then"

Evie clapped her hands happily, "Alright then".

We walked to DX, gossiping about who was going out with who and who was mad about what. We didn't hurry, we'd have all day, and we hadn't had a day to ourselves in a while. When we got to DX, it was really quiet. We went inside and riffled through beauty magazines.

Steve and Soda were sitting on the counter, "Shouldn't you girls be in school?" Steve inquired and Evie just shook her head, "No, not today".

We went through magazines and then decided to go see a movie. We walked to the movie theater, "So, what do you want to watch?" Evie asked me as we walked in,

"How about Hud? " I asked, "I know, it seemes lame, but Paul Newman is in it"

Evie shrugged, "Doesn't matter to me, we've probably seen everything else anyway"

After the movie ended, we walked towards the Ribbon, where all the action was. We went to Dairy Queen, to catch up with our friends from school. We got there and sat outside with the girls. Lauren was fixing her makeup and Sylvia was too busy riffling through a magazine, to even say hi to us.

Lauren turned towards us, "Do I look okay? I'm going to Curly's tonight" I smiled at Evie and then turned to Lauren, "Trust me, he won't be looking at your makeup"

Evie pushed my shoulder, "Lauren, you look fine".

Then I saw my dad's car pulling up and he rolled down the window, "Cassie, need a ride home?"

I answered, without thinking, "No, I'm good"

"Alright" dad said and started rolling up the window. Then I noticed Tim's car pulling in the parking lot and Curly jumped out.

"Hold on dad, I'll come home" I quickly yelled and grabbed my purse. I hugged Evie,

"Thank you. I'll see you later"

I nodded my head in Tim's direction. Evie turned to look and then nodded, "You're welcome, I'll see you tomorrow."

I ran up to the car and got in. As my dad drove off, I looked at Tim, who was smoking a cigarette, looking as handsome and dangerous as ever.

When we were driving, almost home already, dad turned off the radio, "I got a call from the school today, you weren't there today" he said strictly.

I scooted next to him and put his arm around me, "I'm sorry dad.. I think I broke up

with Tim, and Evie just wanted to take me out.. I won't do it anymore"

I said gazing out the window. He tried to look strict, but I could see a little smile curling up the corners of his mouth, "I'm sorry Cassie" he said kissing my head.

When we went home, he acted more like a friend than a dad. He offered me ice cream and we watched TV together. It was the closest I have been with dad in a long time.


	9. Chapter 9

I don't own the Outsiders nor the Shepards. Everything you don't recognize, I own.

The school week was almost over, when I headed for my last period of the week, which was study hall. I hadn't gotten much of my homework done during the week, so I decided to finish that. Or tried to, until Curly sat across from me, with a friend of his, "You okay?" he asked cautiously.

I looked up from my book, "I'll be fine." I said bluntly.

He raised his eyebrows at me,

"What do you want Curly?" I asked, sounding impatient. "I ain't in the mood for your shit today"

He leaned back in his chair, folding his arms, "He ain't gonna let it go, Tim I mean. They hit too close to home"

"Well, he should. It doesn't concern him."

Curly got up, "He doesn't work like that and you know it". I watched him walk away with his friend, and I knew he was right.

After school, I went to Dairy Queen for a milkshake. I walked inside, saw some of Shepard's outfit pull up in a car and for a moment I considered leaving. I walked to the counter and ordered. I sat down at a table next to the window, and stared into nothingness. My mind was filled with memories of Tim, that I tried to push off. I stirred my milkshake with a straw and thought about my brothers. At the moment, I hated them for leaving me.

When I got home, and nobody was there, I sat on the floor and bursted into a helpless cry.

"Fuck" I yelled from the bottom of my lungs, for all of Tulsa to hear.

Suddenly I heard a knock on the door. "Yeah?" I was too exhausted to get up and open the door.

"It's Evie, please open the door"

I leaned my head against the wall and closed my eyes, "It's open".

Evie came in and sat next to me, "I just wanted to see how you were doing" she looked at me pityingly and I raised my brows at her "I'm fine, just letting out steam"

Then I thought of something, "You know, he probably cheated on me too" I stated and she didn't believe me, "I doubt, you ain't like the girls he's usually with. Or used to be." she said while sitting down next to me, "And you were around longer"

Then she stood up and offered me her hand, "But that's not why I'm here" She helped me up and we made our way into the kitchen, "There's a party at Jimmy's tonight, and we're going" she announced and lifted a bottle of Jack on the table.

I groaned and she held her hand up "I'm not taking a no for an answer, you're coming too" Reluctantly, I got us glasses and poured some Jack in them, "Might as well" I said as I emptied the glass. It burned all the way down, making my stomach twist. I shook my head and went upstairs to change into different clothes.

When I came back downstairs, I saw Steve and some of his friends sitting around the kitchen table. He lifted his gaze, "Hey Cas, hope we ain't intruding." The boy next to him grinned and shook my hand, "I'm Two-Bit"

I raised my eyebrow at him, "I already like her" he exclaimed. I couldn't help but smile, "I'm Cassie". Sodapop waved from across the table, and I nodded.

Evie came from the living room and offered me a beer, "Thanks" I said before opening the bottle and taking a swig of it. "So," I tried to start a conversation, "Are you all going to the party also?" I got a series of mm's and uh-huh's as an aswer, so I decided to head for a smoke outside.

I sat on the porch and took a drag of my cigarette. I listened to the happy chatter that came from inside, and looked up at the stars. I had always been a sucker for happy endings, but as that castle had come crumbling down after the fight, I had realized something; maybe it isn't about the ending, maybe it is about the story. My story wasn't worth hearing, and definetly not what I had wanted. But we gotta go with what we got. And right now, I had friends inside, that wanted to have fun, and to be honest, that's what I needed. I grinded my cigarette on the step and went back inside.

Evie was standing at the doorway, waiting for me. I smiled at her, "should we go?" I asked and she looked surprised. "Yes."

She said and tried to get the boys to rush, so we could go and I wouldn't change my mind. We all stuffed into Two-Bit's car and drove to Jimmy's, who was senior at Will

Rogers and lived near Buck's.

As we got there, the party was in full speed. People were already drunk, stumbling on their every step and making out with random people. I walked inside with Evie in my tow, and by some miracle, we found a table to sit around. I sat down and soon after, felt a hand on my shoulder. It was Angela, who undoubtedly, was wasted.

"Hey Cassie" she slurred, "Have you seen my brother?"

I smiled at her attempt to talk clearly, "Which one?" she looked at me, her eyes pointing in different directions, "Curly" she said, clinging on to the back of my chair.

I shook my head, "No, I haven't seen him" She nodded and wobbled off.

I rolled my eyes and turned to look at Evie. She smiled at me and offered me a shot. We took our shots and slammed the glasses on the table. "We should go dancing," I suggested and Evie grinned, "I was hoping you'd say that."

We walked to the dance floor and we danced to some Elvis's song I wasn't familiar with. Not that I listened to him too often, but still.

We had been dancing for a while and my mood was starting to rise. We walked around, looking for people we knew. We bumped into Evie's brother, but he didn't seem happy to see us, as drunk as we were.

We stepped outside for a moment, and I realized how drunk I really was. I sat down on the bench as Evie went to talk to some guy, which I didn't know and I doubt she did either. When the guy left, leaving a string of curse words behind, Evie sat next to me, "I'm glad you came with me"

I looked at her, "Like I had a choice"

She laughed, "Okay, let's put it this way; thank you for not making it hard to get you here"

"You're welcome."

We must've fallen asleep on the bench, because when I opened my eyes, it was dark, and there weren't as many people.

Evie was snoring lightly next to me and I pushed her, "Wakey wakey" She swatted my hand away and opened her eyes, "Shit, how long did we sleep?"

I shrugged, "No idea, let's go see if we still have a ride back"

Evie nodded and we went back inside. We were in luck, because I could see Soda sitting on the couch, looking bored.

I walked up to him, "Where are Steve and Two-Bit? I'm sorta ready to go home"

He smiled, "I'll go get them" he got on his feet and walked swiftly to the other room.

I walked outside with Evie, and saw Angela puking her guts over the railing. I walked over to her and put my hand on her shoulder, "It's all good, I hope Tim doesn't find you like this" She muttered a response, but I couldn't uderstand anything. Then she threw up again. I held her hair and waited for the boys to come outside. As they did, we walked to Two-Bit's car.

At the same moment as I was sliding in the car, Tim drove up and looked pissed, more than usual. He looked at me and I stared into his eyes, then motioned to Angela's direction. I slid in the car and I saw him running up to her, cursing and yelling at her. I felt sorry for her, it's not like she did it on purpose. Or how in the hell do I know.

As soon as Soda drove off, I leaned my head back and looked at Evie, with tears in my eyes, "Shit" I murmured and leaned against her shoulder.

She stroke my hair, "It'll get easier, I promise." Sodapop dropped me off at my house and Evie got ou too, "I'll stay with you"

Steve was sleeping in the car, drooling on the seat, "Just go home with Steve, I'll be fine" I assured her and she took a step back

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, I'm sure. I'll even call you tomorrow."

She went back into the car and they drove off. I walked inside, too tired to climb the

steps and dozed off on the couch.


	10. Chapter 10

I don't own the Outsiders nor the Shepards. Everything you don't recognize, I own.

I woke up to the phone ringing. I looked at the clock on the wall, and it was six in the morning, meaning I had only had a couple of hours of sleep. I pushed myself up and walked into the kitchen. "Hello? I asked tiredly, rubbing my eyes with the back of my free hand.

"Cassie? It's Angela" her voice was shaking and I heard something was wrong.

"What's wrong?"

She sniffled, "Oh God, it's Tim."

My blood turned cold and I tried to understand what she was saying, "What about

him?"

"They got him good this time.. Oh God.. What if he doesn't wake up? What am I gonna do?" she was sobbing and I was wide awake at that point, "Where are you?"

She tried to take a deep breath, but she was shaking too hard, "We're at the hospital, they just wheeled him in.. Jesus fucking Christ Cassie.."

I took a deep breath and tried to think of a thing to say, but came up with nothing, "I'll be right there" I said and put down the reciever.

I didn't even think about anything else but Tim, as I shot out the door to go to the hospital. It was early morning and some people were going to work, so I decided to hitchike because it would beat running.

An older lady picked me up from the Ribbon and looked at me cautiously, "Where are you going in such rush?" I tapped my fingers nervously against my legs, "My boyfriend's in the hospital" "Oh" was all she said as she drove towards the hospital.

The ride took forever, since the lady was afraid of speeding. As she stopped I jumped out of the car and scurried inside the hospital.

The nurse at the desk looked up at me, looking at me like I had something on my face, "How can I help you"

"A boy was brought here maybe half an hour ago" I said trying to catch my breath,

"What is his name?"

"Tim Shepard"

She looked down at her papers, furrowing her brows "We don't have anyone here under that name"

"What?" I asked, now confused.

Then I heard Angela's voice from the other end of the hallway "Cassie"

I sprinted towards her as she collapsed on the floor, "God Ang, are you okay?" I said helping her up.

She shook her head, "He looks so peaceful, it ain't normal.." I sat her down on the seat next to Mike, who raised her brows at me, "Is there something on my face?" I

inquired

He leaned his head against the wall, "No.".

"Where is he?"

"He's in there" he said, pointing his index finger towards a room down the hall.

I walked towards it slowly, my legs feeling weak, like they would give out any second. The door was open and I walked inside. As soon as I saw him, my heart sank and I had to turn around. Tears streamed down my face.

He was surrounded with machines attached to his arms. He looked peaceful, too much so, and looked like he wasn't even breathing. I had seen him look worse, as in black eyes and cuts on his face, but it was nothing compared to this.

I sobbed and took a deep breath, making my way to Curly, who was sitting on a chair in the corner. He didn't look good, bruised, but at least he was still standing. His eyes were dark and he only glanced at me, "What happened?" I asked.

Curly played with an unlit cigarette, "There were five of them and just him. I'd assume they started fighting fair, until someone pulled out a knife.. they fuckin' knifed him" he gritted his teeth, "So many times.. There was so much blood.. I was supposed to be there, but got distratced"

He looked away, guilt obvious on his face. I listened to him, hoping it would be a bad dream, that he was lying to me. God how I wished he was lying. But the beeping sound in the room made it real. I took a chair and took it next to the bed.

I took his hand in mine, "I'm so sorry, it's all my fault" I sniffled and kissed his hand. It felt smoother than normal, and I was sure he was dying.

"Please," I sobbed, "Don't leave me"

I sat there for what felt like forever, just looking for a sign he was there, a sign he was

alive. I winced as the door opened and a doctor strolled inside, "Hello, I'm Dr. White"

I stood up and shook his hand, "I'm Cassie" I said tiredly,

The doctor looked surprised, "Are you a relative?"

I shook my head, "I'm his girlfriend" The doctor nodded and looked at me, wrinkling his nose, "Ah, I see." He put his hands deep in his coat pockets, "He lost a lot of blood and has severe injuries from the stabbing. Also, he has broken ribs and bruises. He's still hanging close in and out, but we have to hope for the best" He said in his sincere voice, "The nurses will be checking on him soon, you can go for coffee downstairs to wait."

I just nodded to him as he left. I sat down and looked at Tim's face. He looked a lot younger than he was, and not nearly as scary as I knew he could be.

The nurses came in with all different kinds of instruments and I went out. I saw Angela sleeping, resting her head on Mike's shoulder. I walked past them, down to the cafeteria to get coffee.

I sat down and closed my eyes, but all I could see was Tim, stuck between all these machines. It scared the shit out of me, not knowing if I'd ever be able to talk to him again. I opened my eyes and saw Curly sitting across from me. He looked exhausted.

I swallowed and looked up at him, "It's my fault he's here" I said to him, "If I hadn't gotten into trouble, he'd still be okay"

I brushed the tears off my cheeks. He rolled his ring, that Tim had given him, on the table, "Nah, he would've gotten into fights anyway, that asshole" he cursed. He was fuming, but too tired to show it, "I should've done something, shit, I should've been there early, we would have had better chances"

I took his hand, "I doubt, they must've had this planned," I sighed, "We've both seen him fight, this wouldn't have happened." I tried to smile but couldn't.

We sat there, drinking our coffees and then made our way back upstairs. The door was still closed, nurses bustling around Tim's bed. He looked so vulnerable on the bed, like everything could hurt him, even the smallest things. I sat down, as far as I could from everyone else, and buried my face in my hands. Then it hit me, why everyone were looking at me funny. I looked at my clothes, and I was wearing what I had worn at the party, reeking like alcohol. I bet I didn't look any better either.

I heard a familiar voice talking and looked up. I saw Miriam hugging Angela, who was sobbing uncontrollably.

I stood up and walked over to them, squeezed Miriam's shoulder, "I'm so sorry" I looked down.

She held her youngest in her arms and looked at me with sad eyes, "It wasn't your fault." She stated, and kissed Angela's cheek, "I'm taking her home" She said as she led Angela out of the hospital.

I walked up to the room, not seeing the nurses anywhere. I opened the door and went to sit next to him. I rested my arms on the edge of his bed, resting my head on my hands. I didn't bother turning around when I heard someone entering the room.

Mike walked in and leaned against the cabinet, "Cas, are you okay" I stared at Tim, "Yeah, I'm okay" I fiddled the sheet, "Could you watch after Curly, make sure he doesn't do anything stupid?"

I asked him, knowing Tim would be furious if Curly got himself beaten up.

Mike looked down at his shoes, "I'll look after him, you look after Tim." Then he thought for a moment and sighed, "It's fucking messed up, this whole thing"

I nodded, "It is"

Then he turned around and went out. I closed my eyes and listened to his quiet breaths, but the beeping sound kept bringing me back to reality.

I only left the hospital to go shower and change clothes. Mike drove me home and back to the hospital, because I insisted on being there for Tim. I think I owed him that much.

We also drove to the Shepards, so that Mike could see on Angela and Curly. I waited in the car, I couldn't go in the house, that would make it too real. It was easier to deny than accept it.

Mike walked back to the car, backing up from the driveway without a word. We drove back to the hospital, both of us lost in thought. I climbed out of the car and lit up a cigarette and Mike followed suit.

We watched as an ambulance drove to the door. Two men came outside, wheeling a little boy inside, his mother by his side, telling him it was gonna be alright. It reminded me of Tim and his mother, she had always been there for him, even when he does stupid shit. I mean, when you think about it, it isn't stupid, he's just street smart; he knows how the things on the streets worked. But to others, it seems like stupid shit.

I dropped the cigarette butt and grinded it with my shoe. Walking back down the hallway towards his room, I looked around and saw myself in a mirror. I looked tired, bags under my eyes were twice the size and my eyes were red, probably mostly from crying though. I felt a dull throb in my head, but didn't let it bother.

Then I remembered I had promised to call Evie, so I went to the nearest payphone and put in coins. I dialed her number and waited for someone to answer.

"Hmmm?" I could hear she had just woken up.

"Hey Evie, it's me" I wanted to get the phone call over with, "Listen, I'm gonna be quick. Tim's in the hospital, so I'm gonna be here."

I could almost hear the thoughts running into each other, "What?" she managed to ask.

"Yeah, he got in a fight. But I gotta go, I'll talk to you later" I said and waited for an answer, which I didn't get. I hung up and walked to the door of his room, just to look at him.

I sat next to him for hours, trying to get him to wake up. I talked to him, waiting for an answer I didn't get. The nurses came from time to time to check on him, saying everything was okay, no dramatic changes for the worse. I hoped it meant he would wake up soon.

I was sitting next to Tim's bed, my legs pulled against my chest, when I heard a quiet knock on the door. I lifted my gaze and saw Evie standing in the hallway. I went to the hallway, taking one last look at Tim before exiting the room.

Evie put her arms around me, "I'm so sorry"

I felt tears on my cheeks, "I don't know what I'll do, if.." I couldn't even finish my sentence.

She put her arm behind my back and started leading me towards the cafeteria, "He'll be fine". I sat down, and Evie walked up to the counter to get us coffee.

She came to sit with me, and I gazed into my coffee, "To be honest, I don't know what the hell I'm doing. First I tell him to fuck off and then I come here and cry beside him" I looked at Evie, "Maybe I should just go home and think this through.. I'm a fucking cry baby"

Evie smiled, "I don't think you admit it to yourself, but he means a lot to you" she shook her head lightly, "If I didn't know you this well, I'd say you might even love him." "But it's you, of course you wouldn't love him," she added sarcastically.

"Very funny," I commented as I finished my coffee, "I'm gonna go home, and see about it in a few days"

Evie stood up too, "I'll come with you". We got up and walked out of the hospital, towards Ryan's car. Evie sat behind the steering wheel and I slid in next to her. We sped off, in the direction of my house.

When we arrived, there was nobody home, which was no surprise. We sat down in the kitchen and I made us sandwiches, "I miss him like crazy" I finally admitted and broke the silence. Evie drank her juice, trying to hide a smile. I gave her the sandwich and sat down across from her, "But I hate it when he treats me like I'm just one of his friends, I think I deserve more than that." Evie didn't say anything as I continued,

"Steve treats you nice, doesn't he?"

Evie smiled, "Yeah, he does."

"He holds your hand, he tells you he cares about you, he kisses and hugs you, in PUBLIC too," I said and she nodded, "Well, I ain't got any of that" I told her sadly.

Evie leaned back in her chair, "I think you knew it from the beginning, Tim hasn't really been the steady and lovey-dovey sort" then she added, "Besides, you knew he was fucking Sylvia, didn't you?" I was surprised of her saying fuck, it didn't belong to her vocabulary.

I looked as this was the first time I heard about this, "What? I had no clue." Evie rolled her eyes "But, it really wasn't the reason I left with him from the party.." I

added.

"What party?" She asked, clueless of what had happened. "Don't take this the wrong way; you're my best friend and I tell you everything. I just didn't think anything would come out of it" I told truthfully, since I was well aware that he didn't go steady, at least he hadn't.

_It was the big party at Buck's last August, before school started. I went there with Kevin, since Nick had gone inside few weeks prior to that, and you were at your grandma's with your parents. _

_"_I can't believe you missed the big party though," I said and Evie made herself comfortable and waited for me to continue.

_I was sitting with Kevin and some of the Shepard outfit, drinking beer and watching them play poker. Then I saw Sylvia walking towards our table and I walked up to the bar. I sat on one of the bar stools and Ryan came up to me, asking me to dance. I went dancing with him, of course, and he's a pretty good dancer. After a while, I went back by the bar, to have a shot. I looked around and saw Sylvia flirting with Kevin, who was drunk enough to go with her. _

"That's why you don't really like her?" Evie asked,

"Partially, Most of it is though, 'cause I think she's a skank" I said and Evie smiled a little.

_I took a few shots, just to loosen up a little. Then I saw Tim walking in, straight into the table with Kevin. I saw Sylvia going around the table and sitting next to Tim. I walked up there and sat next to Kevin. I saw Tim looking at me and winked. I looked in my lap, I can still feel the blush creeping on my cheeks. _

"And the best part, was the expression on Sylvia's face," I exclaimed.

_Kevin was already drunk, he could barely hold the cards in his hand. "Bring me a beer" he muttered to me and pointed at the bar. I raised my brows, "No, go get it yourself, if you can still make it there" _

_He wasn't too happy, he pushed me harder and I got up. "Go get the beer" he ordered. _

_I told him to shove it up his ass, gave him the finger and walked away. I went outside for a smoke, since it was hot inside and sat down on the porch. I still had a full beer and time to waste. I walked around the yard, looking at cars until I spotted the one I was looking for; Tim's_

_._

_I sat on the hood, just waiting. Soon enough, I saw some of his boys outside, and they were looking at me. One of them went inside and came outside with Tim. _

_He walked up to me, grinning, "Are you lost ma'am?" He asked in a southern accent and lifting his imaginary cowboy hat. _

_"No, I don't think so" I said._

_"You're far away from heaven, you know" _

_"Not what I hear"_

_He chuckled, "Let's go in and I'll show how far away you are" _

_I raised my brow, "You think I sink as low as Sylvia?" _

_"Well, you need to see for yourself, how low she's sunk" he said, winking._

_"I ain't going in there," I said pointing at Buck's, "It ain't my style" I told him. _

_He turned around and walked to the passenger side, opening the door, "So, what's taking so long?" He asked. I hopped off the hood and walked to him, sliding in the car. He closed the door, waved at his boys outside and sat in the car. _

_I was making it hard for him to drive to his house, and when we finally got there, he opened the door like a gentleman, and lifted me up. I twisted my legs around him and he took me inside. He closed the door by pushing me against it, and then he took me upstairs. _

"Okay," Evie said raising her arms up, "I don't need details"

I smiled at her, "I wasn't going to give them to you" I said, and continued,

_Next morning I woke up and rolled on my stomach. I felt his hand slide down my back and I shivered. I turned my head to look at him and he was looking at me, propped on his elbow. I looked at the fine lines of his muscles as he pushed my hair behind my ear. Then he sat on the edge of the bed and I turned away from him, to button up my shirt. I walked around the bed and he was looking at me. I turned around and sat on his lap, facing him. He had his arms around me, just below the waist line, and I put my arms around his neck, kissing his cheek softly. I could hear him chuckle and it made me feel all warm and fuzzy inside. I traced my fingers down the scar on his face. _

_I could feel his hands unbuttoning my shirt, when the door flew open and Curly was standing in the door way, "Where'd you go last night?" He yelled, "I had to fucking walk home." _

_Tim took a firmer grip around me and he got up, lifting me with him. He slammed me against the door, closing it. I giggled and he kissed my neck and unbuttoned my shirt. He threw it on the floor and I gave everything to him. _

_He took me home about an hour later, and even kissed me before I got out of the car. _

"I bet Curly got quite the ass whooping when Tim went back home," Evie said,

"I'd guess so" I sighed, "Now you know what happened."

Evie smiled arrogantly, "He's still taking your shit, I'd say he likes you a lot, maybe

even loves you," Then she added, "I mean, if he's capable of it."

"I don't know, it's so hard to trust him, still, about being faithful. He doesn't tell me he loves me, he doesn't actually tell me anything."

"Just wait til he wakes up and talk to him, that's how you'll find out." Evie said and got up, "Let's go, you're staying the night at my house." I got up and got some things with me, walking behind her into the car.

I spent the night at her house, we watched an old movie and painted our nails, just like we used to when we were younger. While laying in bed, we talked about our lives for hours, and for the first time in a while, I felt relieved.


	11. Chapter 11

I don't own the Outsiders nor the Shepards. Everything you don't recognize, I own.

I had stayed away from the hospital for a few days, just going to school and studying at home. Life felt so simple, no worrying about anything. Today though, I decided to go visit Tim, I didn't even know if he was awake. I was having lunch at school with Evie and we sat down on the grass, next to school.

I had barely touched my lunch, "Are you okay?" Evie asked me, taking a bite of her sandwich.

"Yeah, I'm going to see Tim today" I said, and she looked up, "Oh, well, I hope everything goes well."

She said and got up to go back to classes. I was happy I only had biology, but then I'd have to face Tim.

The time dragged on, as I waited the bell to ring and I could leave. When it finally did, I was out of my seat and out of the school faster than I'd thought possible. I walked towards the Dingo, looking for a ride. To my luck, Steve was leaning against his car, talking to his friends.

I walked up to them, "Could you take me to the hospital?"

Steve looked at me, "Yeah, you going to see Tim?"

I nodded, "I gotta go by his house first, would it be okay?"

Steve shrugged, "I guess so.".

He took me to Tim's house and I walked in. It was the first time in there after the fight. I walked up the steps and they made the familiar creaking sound. I walked into his room and took a bag from under his bed and stuffed clothes in it. I also took the liberty of putting a pack of cigarettes and his blade into the bag.

I walked downstairs and looked around; there was no sign of us fighting, no sign of the broken bottle. I took a deep breath and smiled, maybe this was what I needed.

I walked back to the car, Steve was drumming the wheel as I sat in the car. "What you got there?" He asked as he started towards the hospital.

"I'm taking him a change of clothes" I said bluntly. After that, we were silent for the rest of the ride. He parked the car and I got out. I walked in and didn't see any familiar people in the waiting room.

A fear grew inside me as I approached the room, until I heard a familiar voice talking. I had missed him so much and I felt tears streaming down my face. I quickly brushed them away and took a few breaths, before walking to the door. I leaned against the door frame and at first he didn't notice me. He went on about 'some fucking idiot having the balls to pull this off' and I just looked around; all of his boys were there, just listening to him.

I felt a hand on my shoulder and looked around. Mike was standing behind me and I smiled at him. Then I looked back at Tim, who was staring at me. Mike cleared his throat behind me, and Tim grinned, "Are you lost ma'am?"

I looked down and felt my face get hotter, "No, I don't think so" I said and he chuckled. "You're far from heaven you know" He smiled at his own brilliance, "That was one night, wouldn't you agree"

I nodded, looking at the people passing me as they cleared the room.

I walked to the window and put his back down. I took a chair and sat down next to him, "How are you feeling?" I asked and added, "Where's your gown?"

He looked at me, "I've been better, and do you think I'd wear that pansy dress? Fuck no." He said and scratched his chest, where I could see dried blood and deep cuts. I had to look away and he noticed it, "Look, this ain't bad." he took my hand in his and put it on his chest so I could feel his heart beating, "I'm alive, ain't I"

I looked at him, "Yeah, you are"

Then I shook my head, pulling my hand away from his, "I can't believe this happened, I'm so sorry" I said, still looking down.

"Nothing to be sorry about, it wasn't your fault." Then he smiled, "If I tell you something, you gotta stop moping, okay? And," he added, "It'll never leave this room"

I nodded, waiting for him to talk. "I was seeing stars by the time they started knifing me, and all I could think about was how would you do without me. I was afraid they'd get you next and I wouldn't be there, protecting you." He looked down and grinned, "I'm getting soft".

I was staring at him, not being able to say anything. 'Had he just told me that he cares about me? That would be the first', I thought to myself.

Suddenly there was a knock on the door, and Nick walked in, looking at both of us. I darted out of the chair and ran to hug him. "When did you get out?" I inquired as I pulled away from him.

"This morning, went by the house and then to the tracks, where Mike was, and he said you'd be here" he explained.

Then he walked up to Tim, holding his hand out, "Shepard", Tim shook his hand

without hesitation, "Savage".

Nick cocked his brow, "Who did that?" He asked his tone flat.

Tim shrugged, "I'm not sure, but I think Damian got some people after me.. I'd say they want my turf"

Then Nick looked like the idea hit him like a lightning, "I see, what do you want me to do?"

"Nothing for now, I gotta figure this shit out" Tim was pissed, that's for sure. I had sat back down.

Tim looked at me, then back at Nick, "Just make sure they don't do anything stupid til I get out"

Nick nodded, kissed my forehead and walked out, "I'll wait you outside" he added, before leaving.

"So," I started and got up, "I got you some clothes in the bag, and your knife and cigarettes too." I told him, when he grabbed my wrist, pulling me next to his bed.

I looked at him, and he looked so vulnerable, just like the little boy that was brought in here with his mom. Tim put his hand on my hip, and I leaned in to kiss him softly. It was something I hadn't experienced before, it was so passionate, that it made me feel wanted, like he did it out of pure love.

I pulled away from him and felt his rough hands on both sides of my face. My heart was beating fast, like it had been my first kiss. I straightened myself, "I gotta go, I'll come back later or tomorrow"

I saw him smirking, "Later today, it would put my old, worried mind at ease" I smiled at him and exited the room, almost running into Curly. He looked angry, but I didn't

want know what about, so I ran up to Nick and we headed home.

On the way we stopped by at the Dingo, and Nick turned to look at me, "Just wait in the car" he got out and walked in the Dingo. I got out of the car and lit up a cigarette, as I waited for Nick to come back. It was oddly quiet, but I just assumed someone was having a party somewhere.

Soon enough, he walked back out, and went straight into the car. I flicked my cigarette away and sat next to him. He drove off, driving way over the speed limit and halting by our house. "Get out, I gotta do something"

I looked at him, horrified, "What are you gonna do?" I asked him, my voice shaking, "I just gotta do something, I'll be back after"

I got out of the car and he sped off right after. I stood there for a while, looking after him, before I went inside.

I went inside and plopped on the couch. I didn't feel like doing anything, so I turned on the TV and lied on the couch. I watched part of a football game, but when I heard the door slam, I stood up.

It was Nick, and he looked old and tired. I went up to him, putting my arms around his waist, "What's up?" I asked and squeezed him harder when he tried to back out.

"I went to talk to Damian, and I found something else out." He then looked down at me, "Nothing that concerns you though" he added.

I just nodded, "Will you take me back to the hospital? I said I'd go back today"

"Yeah, I have to talk to him".

When we went inside the hospital, I could see Tim's mom in the lobby, going into his room. I could hear Angela's high pitched voice as she was telling something to Tim, probably something that Tim didn't give a shit about, but he still listened. I had always admired that about him.

I walked closer and I could see Curly and Lauren sitting in the waiting room. It seemed like they were fighting about something. I walked past them and waved, not bothering to wait for an answer. As I reached the door, I listened to Angela's story about a party she had been in. I could see from the look on their mother's face, that she didn't want to hear all the details about it. She knew that they'd go to parties even if she said they couldn't, so she didn't. But that didn't mean she should hear everything that goes on in them.

I walked in and sat next to Angela, who turned to look at me and smiled. Tim turned to look at his ma, "Take Angel home, will ya? I gotta talk to Cassie"

Miriam turned towards the door and waited for Angela. She turned to look at me and smiled.

I smiled back and then turned to Tim, "So?" He waited until Nick came in and closed the door.

"Alright, what's the score?" He asked Nick.

Nick shifted uncomfortably, "I think someone's turning their back on you" he said coldly.

Tim didn't look surprised, "Figured as much, otherwise I wouldn't be stuck in this shit hole. I know for a fact it ain't Curly, he wouldn't have balls to do it. And it ain't you or Kevin. So what are we left with?"

I looked at both of them, feeling like my mouth was hanging open, "What?" I stuttered out. Both of them looked at me and rolled their eyes.

Then Nick turned to Tim, "I think it's Mike, David or Robert, since the younger ones wouldn't dare."

Tim nodded, "You're probably right. You find out who it is and then I'll end this" he said, a determined set to his eyes. Nick nodded and walked out.

Tim sat up and pulled out the IV in his arm. I grimaced and turned away. "Why'd you do that?"

He snorted, "So you can come up here with me" I turned to look at him and he scooped on the other side of the bed. I climbed next to him, laid my head on his chest and put my arm around him. I felt his strong arms around me and I listened to his soft breathing.

He kissed my forehead, "I missed you," he whispered and I looked up at him. I kissed his cheek, the stubble tickling my face, and laid back down.


	12. Chapter 12

I dont' own the Outsiders nor the Shepards. Everything you don't recognize, I own.

The next morning I woke up to Tim stroking my hair. Last night felt like a dream and I didn't want to wake up.

I just curled up closer to Tim and I heard him chuckle, "Good morning" he said in his rough voice.

"Jesus," I start as I open my eyes, "What time is it?"

Tim's holding back a laughter, "It's almost 11"

I sat up, "Holy shit, I'm so late" I jumped off the bed and looked around for my purse, which I didn't see. 'Shit' I cursed under my breath, "My dad's gonna kill me".

Tim pulled out the other IV from his arm and got up from the bed, "No he ain't." he stated.

I turned to face him, "What are you doing up?" Tim shrugged, "I got shit to take care of" he said, then added, "And I can't stand the food here."

The doctor came back in and looked at Tim, "You aren't well enough to go home yet," he said sternly.

Tim opened his mouth to say something, but I interrupted him, "He won't" I said smiling, and the doctor nodded approvingly, then walked out to talk to the nurse.

I turned to Tim, "You are staying here, like it or not" He was being a pain in my ass, "No, I'm leaving and that's final. Let's see them trying to stop me" he said, pulling up his jeans.

I put my hands on my hips, as I was in deep shit with dad and tired of Tim's attitude, "You leave, and I promise to put you back here myself," I threatened him.

A grin spread across his face, "That I'd like to see".

"I'm being serious, a couple of more days won't hurt you"

We went back and forth about it for a while, and I could see he was getting angrier by the minute.

He was hurting and apparently sick of me talking back to him. He pushed me against the wall, "I wasn't asking, you hear. I'm leaving."

I pushed him off, as he tried to make it up and kiss me,

"Fine then," I said, spitting out the words, "You do whatever the fuck you want, so

will I".

Then I walked out the door, leaving him stand there. I heard the boys talking but when they saw me, all of them fell silent.

I walked out of the hospital, looking for a way to get home. I saw a bus leaving the hospital, waved at the driver and he haulted the bus, "Thank you" I said as I got on the bus. I sat down in the back, leaning my head against the window, thinking about our relationship. I think I'd had enough of his shit, and wanted to just get away from him for a while.

I got off by Dairy Queen, when I saw Evie and Sylvia sitting out in the sun, smoking. I sat with them and lit my own cigarette, "I think I was stupid enough to believe that he would actually want to be with me"

I stated to Evie and she looked at me, "You broke up with Tim?" It was more of a statement than question,

"Yeah" I said.

Sylvia looked at me, "Why'd you do that? He's the wet daydream of all girls" "And good in bed," She added.

I looked at her, "You go for it then" I said with venom in my voice, "He's a shithead and will boss you around like he does everybody else" I said.

She muttered something.

Evie was listening to us, first confused, then angry, "Quit it" She said, raising her voice, "Why can't you just act decent, huh? I'm so fucking tired of you two, bickering about something completely irrelevant"

We both sat there quiet, just staring at her. I had never heard her so angry. "Sorry" I said, not even knowing who I was apologizing to.

Sylvia looked at me, then held her hand out to me, "Truce?" She asked, and I shook her hand, "Truce". I never thought that I'd be in any sort of 'good terms' with Sylvia, but weird shit happens all the time.

We sat there for a while, looking at people passing us and boys whistling from a passing car. I had never even paid attention to things like this before, maybe it was time for a change.

When I finally got home, my dad was waiting for me in the kitchen, "I thought you promised you wouldn't skip anymore. You know," he said cocking his eyebrow, "They're gonna call me everytime you don't show up" He added strictly.

I sat down next to him, "I know, I'm sorry." I really was, it wasn't my intention to skip, I had just fallen asleep. "I didn't mean to" I said, when dad stayed quiet.

He looked up, "I'm really disappointed in you, You didn't used to be like this" He said, shaking his head. "Does it have something to do with the Shepard kid?"

"Yes, I spent the night at the hospital with him. We broke up though, so no worrying about him anymore" I said, looking out the window. It hurt inside, to say that I wasn't with Tim anymore, but I think it's best for everyone.

"Well, good then, if this will make you the responsible adult I raised." He said and got up, "I'll go to work on the site for the night, so we can get all the roofing done," and with that, he was out the door.

I just sat in the kitchen, looking down at my lap. My life had changed a lot in the last year, and I didn't know if it was for better or for worse.

That night, I was walking aimlessly around the streets. I was walking past the field, where I had had my first kiss, with a boy I had a crush on in 6th grade. I smiled at the memory and a car honked behind me. I jumped and turned around, only to be face to face with Damian, "What are you doing here?" he asked, smiling.

I took a few steps back, "Nothing special, just walking" I said, as if it wasn't the obvious.

Damian rolled his eyes, "You know, you shouldn't be walking here all by yourself"

I shrugged, and he got out of the car, leaning against the door. He flicked a cigarette from behind his ear and lit it up. He was smoking it and studying me, "I heard, that there is a meeting between Shepard and the Brumly boys" He stated,

I shrugged again, "I wouldn't know"

He nodded, "So Tim's finally learning to keep ladies out of business"

I shook my head at him, "He hasn't involved me ever.." I said, trailing off.

Damian smiled and sat back in the car, "I'll see you later" He said, intentionally reminding me of the car.

When I got back home, Nick was sitting in the living room, drinking Jack. I sat next to him, "Look Cassie," he started, "I need a ride to the warehouse."

Warehouse was the place where Tim went on with his business, at least that's what I heard. He had taken me there a couple of times, but he had always kept me out of his business.

I propped my feet on the coffe table, "Alright, just don't get too drunk" I asked, looking at the bottle in his hands. He put it on the table and wobbled off into the kitchen. He dropped the keys next to me on the couch, and I grabbed them, making my way into the car.

He had been the one to teach me to drive, but no one ever really asked me to drive. He sat next to me and pushed the lighter in right away. I backed out of the driveway and when the lighter popped out, he lit up a cigarette. "You're gonna have to tell me where we're going." I told him and he looked at me in disbelief, "You ain't been there?"

"Once, but I wasn't really paying attention."

He flicked his ashes out the window, "Okay, just drive down to the tracks, it's near the freight trains" He said bluntly, looking out the window.

I drove there, making a few loops, since I hadn't been driving there before. When we got there, there was a younger boy at the gate. Nick rolled down his window, the boy greeted him and opened the gate for us.

I parked the car and looked around, not recognizing the cars out there. Most of them were expensive cars, probably stolen from the West side.

We went inside the big building. There were a couple of boys from the Brumly and I walked a little closer to Nick. I could feel them looking at us, and when I saw Tim by the other room with Matt, the Brumly leader, I felt a shiver run down my back. Something awful was gonna happen, always when the two were in the same place.

Curly was smoking in the side of the building and I made my way to him, "What's happening here?"

Curly blew his smoke in my face, "They're gonna stomp some King ass" He said, a smile creeping on his face.

"Shit" I said and Curly laughed, "You honestly thought he'd leave it at that."

Then I turned around to look at all the people here. I scanned the room and I noticed a Brumly, bragging about a car he had stolen just before coming here. He was dangling the keys in his hands and then put them in his jeans' pocket. He was a good-looking boy, probably a little older than me and seemed like the others were respecting him.

He walked into the office, probably to get a beer.

"I'll be right back," I said to Curly, even though he probably didn't care.

I walked after the boy into the office. He was opening a beer bottle by the sink and I closed the door, locking it and hopped on the counter next to him, "I haven't seen you here before"

He was startled, but tried to hide it, "What's a pretty lady like you doing here?" he

inquired, coming closer to me.

I smiled, "I'm looking for some company" I said, adjusting myself on the counter. He stopped in front of me and I twisted my legs around him. He grinned and put his hands on my hips. He leaned to kiss my neck and I put my hands around his neck. I could feel him unbuttoning my shirt, and I pulled his t-shirt over his head and threw it in the corner.

Things were getting heated, as I reached my hand down into his pocket and pulled out the keys. He was too concentrated in taking my shirt off, that he didn't notice.

As if on cue, Nick barges into the room, breaking down the door. I quickly pulled back from the boy and buttoned my shirt, putting the keys in my pocket, like nothing wasn't going on a moment before.

Nick stormed to me, "What the fuck do you think you're doing?" I looked up at him, smiling, "Nothing that concerns you" The boy tried to slip past him, but Nick slammed his fist in the guy's chest. He turned his attention to him, punching him right into his face.

I straightened out my clothes and felt the car keys in my pocket. Nick was throwing punches and Tim walked in, looking at me and then the fight. "Hey," he yelled and Nick looked up, "Don't beat him into a pulp, we might need him"

Then he looked at me, "What are you doing?"

"Whatever tha fuck I want" I snapped at him and walked out of the office.

I walked past Curly, winked at him and walked out. I dug my pocket for the keys and tried them on all of the cars, when they finally fit a nice dark blue Stingray. I sat in the drivers' seat, hoping that the car would start. As I turned the keys in the ignition, the car growled and started, without a cough. I drove up to the gate, where the same boy was standing. He was stupid enough to just wave and open the gate, so I sped off towards the King turf, right by the river.

I had been driving for a while, when it actually hit me; I was driving a stolen car, which I had actually stolen from someone. I started panicking that maybe the cops will pull me over, but I didn't see anyone anywhere.


	13. Chapter 13

I don't own the Outsiders nor the Shepards. Everything you don't recognize, I own.

As I got to the King turf, I was driving around places I thought I might find Damian. I went into a bar, asking for him.

The bartender looked at me, "He ain't here. What do ya need him for?"

I leaned my arms against the counter, "I have something of his" I reported, trying to sound confident. Under all that, I was scared shitless. If I got caught, it could be a long stint in prison or I could even wind up dead.

The bartender kept drying the glasses, "He doesn't come here, try the bar by the old bridge" I thanked him and walked back out to the car, happy to see the empty streets.

I drove towards the bridge, and only realized then, that it was close to the border with Tim's turf. 'Goddamn it' I cursed in the car and sped up a little, not enough to get a

ticket.

I drove to the parking lot, and saw Damian and his boys burn something in an old barrel, drinking beer. I drove up to them and Damian looked at the car, squinting to see the driver.

I haulted and got out, Damian grinned wider than I had ever seen anyone grin. "Well, well, this for me?"

I tossed the keys to him and he caught them. "Yeah, now you can leave me alone."

He nodded in approval, "I could use someone like you here" he said spreading his arms, proud of his outfit and his turf.

"Uh, thanks but no thanks" I said and started walking towards Tim's turf, where I

knew I'd be safer than here.

"Hey," he yelled after me "Where'd you get this?"

I lifted my arms up "None of your business".

I was walking towards a small corner shop, the sounds from the Kings' party in the background, when I saw something a little further away. I stopped and squinted. It was Tim and some Brumly's, including the boy whose car I had taken. They were driving towards me, and I had to turn around and walk back towards Damian. He saw me turning around and was about to yell something, until he saw the reason I turned around.

I walked past the boys and Damian came up to me, "What are they doing here? They come here because of you?"

I shook my head vigorously, "No, I swear. I didn't know they were coming here"

I walked past him, but a car veered in front of me. I saw the guy jump out of the car, coming right towards me, "You bitch," He growled between his teeth, "You're gonna pay for this."

I was waiting for a hit that never came. He was looking at Matt, whose behind him, "Your car is fine, use your energy on something useful" he ordered.

The boy, whose name I didn't bother asking, walked away from me and I let out a relieved sigh. Until I saw that they were all prepared for a fight, holding their hands in their pockets, feeling their blades.

I felt a hand on my shoulder and looked back. It was Curly, who Tim had probably ordered not to fight, "Let's get out of here" He said and frankly, I didn't feel like putting up a fight.

I got in the car with them and we sped off. I turned back and watched as a fight was starting. There was gonna be a lot of blood shed tonight, and all because of a stupid grudge. I looked around the people and spotted Nick and Kevin, who I thought was still in jail, apparently not. I sighed, 'assholes' to myself and Curly grinned, looking at me from the rearview mirror.

Tim always told me that we shouldn't hold grudges against people, just straight forward revenge. I thought about that when I sank lower in my seat.

The next morning my dad came into my room to wake me up. I was hoping all of that had just bee na bad dream, but honestly I couldn't tell until I heard the words. "Your brother's back in" were my dad's exact words.

As we drove towards the Tulsa City Jail, where Nick would be held, at least for now, I felt guilt growing inside me. When we arrived, my dad took me inside, and motioned me to sit down when he talked to the guard by the counter. By the looks of it, they knew each other. The guard walked back to the cells.

Dad sat next to me, "They'll let you in soon, I'll wait you outside" He kissed my temple and walkd out, shaking his head.

I hung my head low, waiting for a sign I was still sleeping.

The guard walked up to me, "You are Cassie, correct?"

I nodded, too tired to say anything. He motioned for me to follow into the room. As I got in, I saw Nick sitting at the other side of the table, cuffed into the table. His face had traces of a fight.

I sat down, remorse written all over my face. "You really are stupid sometimes" He shook his head, "You could be sitting here you know"

I bit my lip and looked up, "What happened?"

Nick leaned back in the chair, folding his arms, "All hell broke loose, that's what happened" I waited for him to continue, "The fight started, and it wasn't just skin on skin. Tim was smart enough to leave before the fuzz came. I just kept on fighting. And that's why I'm here."

He opened his palms and I put my hand in his, "They're charging me with murder, Cas"

I was shocked, my brother had killed someone. My eyes flew open, and I couldn't breathe. He shook his head, "Mike had turned on Tim, we had to do something. When he started to fight against us, all I saw was red. I just wanted to end him, you know.. That's why Damian knew where Tim'd be and that you were my sister"

I wanted to pull my hand away from his, I was so angry, but at the same time, I understood that all he wanted to do was to protect me. "I'm so sorry" I muttered, not knowing what else to say.

He gave me a tired smile, "Don't be, there's nothing we can do" He stated, and the door opened. A tall man in a suit walked in, glaring at me. I got up and took a last look at Nick, before exiting. I walked out to the car with dad, and we started home. We drove in silence, neither of us either didn't know what to say or didn't want to talk about it.

When we pulled up on our driveway, Kevin was sitting on the porch, looking like hell. His face was bruised and cut up.

I jumped out of the car and ran to him, throwing my arms around him, "Oh God" I lamented.

He put his arms around me, "You are an idiot, you know that" He yelled at me.

"I know" I agreed and felt tears running down my face, "I just tried to do the right thing"

Kevin pushed me back, "The cops will take me to the station for questioning, since they know me down there, and I'll tell them I beat up Damian" He sighed, "I know they are charging Nick with murder, but if they get anything else on him, he's riding the lighting."

He looked down, and I felt my heart swell. I loved my brothers more than anything and we all looked after each other. So Kevin will go into Mac to protect Nick from getting the death penalty.

I hugged him tightly, and didn't let go when he tried to push me off.

"Look Cassie, just don't do stupid shit when we're away. I told Tim to look after you"

I paused and pulled myself away from him, "How long will you be in?"

He shrugged and got up, "I don't know, probably 15 or more" I looked down, wiping the tears off of my cheeks. Kevin walked into the car and with that, he drove away. I walked in, where dad was waiting for me.

He closed the door and I went up into my room and laid on the floor, looking up at the ceiling. The white ceiling would be boring, if the sun wasn't shining and leaving shadows on it. I looked at them closely and then closed my eyes, 'What did I get myself into' I asked myself and thought about the last few weeks of my life.

My thoughts lost their way back into Tim, and I thought about our time together. All the things he had done and said, things that hurt. Then I realized, he had done all that for me. It was also the reason, why Kevin had asked Tim to look after me. I sat up, thinking about what I should do.

I got up and headed downstairs. Dad's car keys were sitting on the counter and I grabbed them, "Dad, I gotta go do something" I said and heard a quiet bye, as he was going through pantries in search for food.

I drove off, my mind on my brothers and Tim. 'I should've done this a long time ago' I mumbled to myself, as I made my way to Buck's. I parked outside, and walked in. Buck was putting glasses back into the shelf and Curly sat there, drinking a beer.

"Ain't it a little early for a beer?" I asked him and he looked up, surprised to see me,

"Never" He smiled, that quickly faded away. I looked around and saw that everyone was anxious, like they were waiting for something. Curly massaged his face, bruise forming around his eye.

"Where's Tim?" I asked casually.

He nodded his head towards upstairs, "You really shouldn't go there, he's mad as hell"

I shrugged, "We'll see" I said and walked up the steps.

The steps squeaked under my feet and when I reached the top, there was a door open. I walked to it, opening it quietly and leaning against the wooden frame.

Tim was facing the window, I looked his back as his shoulders slouched forward, "They are going in for what I did." He stated and I knew he was referring to Nick and Kevin. "Shit, it's fucking crazy" he said, his voice angry but almost like a whisper.

"He wasn't innocent alright, but his brother didn't deserve this" He said, hanging his head low.

I walked up to him, holding my hands on his hips, "Look, what's past is past, and you can't change that. You did the best you could." I kissed his neck, "You're a leader, and did what you had to protect everyone else"

Tim turned to look at me, resting his hands on my hips. "I love you no matter what," I told him, "And I'll stand by you." Then I smiled and tip-toed to kiss his lips. "Get your shit together, so we can go downstairs."

He pulled me into a hug and held me for a long time. I knew he didn't know what to say and I didn't expect anything. When he finally pulled away from me, he was smiling.

"How in the hell do I deserve someone like you?"

I shrugged, "It's not about deserving, it's about knowing the score"

By then, he took me in his arms, kicked the door closed and threw me on the bed.

After an hour, we walked downstairs, hand in hand. He had never held my hand like that, and I felt like for the first time, that I actually meant something to him, something more than just a burden to carry along.


End file.
